Another day in paradise

 I took Tee to Byron for the weekend. I attended a conference - she sat at the pool and ate grapes.

Fantastic resort, fabulous food and eclectic company.

The Caxton Awards are an industry forum for Agency Creative types and Newspapers to celebrate and discuss creativity in print.

I managed to keep business and pleasure separate until Saturday evening when I thought it would be a good idea for Tee to come along at the end of the gala dinner to watch the “Annual Talent Show”

The prerequisite is that you must be completely deviod of talent. Anyone risking getting up on stage and singing like Frank or playing guitar like Jimmy is instantly booed off!

Tee came in and sat at our table to watch the “entertainment” unfolding on stage.

Needless to say there had been a constant parade to the toilets all evening by members of the audience who obviously were suffering from bad stomach cramps as they all spent enormous amount of time in the cubicles….

So to the first act..

Pissed creative announces that having lost a bet earlier the evening his forfeit was to have his bollocks shaved. Now. On stage.

And then his copywriter partner joined him on stage and subsequently applied hot wax to his balls. 

Following a dramatic and theatrical removal of the wax strip, a bloodcurdling scream and a creative hitting the floor clutching his gonads, the place erupted!

Thankfully the rest of the acts weren’t quite as graphic but were all as equally profane in every respect.

Needless to say the waiting staff in this 5 star resort were somewhat taken aback.

We then all retreated to the bar until they shut the bar at 1.00am. But no problem there - they all started rolling and smoking joints. 

Needless to say the waiting staff in this 5 star resort were somewhat taken aback.

But nowhere near as much as my missus! 

I can’t recall it ever happening at The Albion….